Vickery Trickery

by Frankie Lassut⁽⁵⁾
Franco

I watched This Morning the other day. On it, Ferns’ hubby the Celeb chef Phil Vickery was in Miami, Florida, sampling some seafood. Sea food is cool, and I was jealous of course. And, I don’t know if anyone else feels like this, but, I watch these cookery programmes and then get pissed off with my own skills, because can’t cook stuff and find that most food you buy tastes of nothing anyway.... and I’m reduced to cutting out stuff like tomatoes, and cucumbers, and bloody mushrooms due to lack of flavour...I’m really *****d! off with the whole game.

But, I watch him, dribbling (me not him) while he eats crab claws. Interestingly, when they harvest the claws, they don’t actually take the whole crab from the sea, they chop off the claws, and the crabs re generate claws. I didn’t catch their name because I wasn’t interested until I heard that part, and so, I wrote to This Morning... Stone Crabs.

But, Phil delivered something astounding, and a great business idea for a budding entrepreneur or two.

a/ The crabs re generate the claws. Ok. Fine, that’s acceptable to most humans. But. I talked to someone, on My Space, who told me that her and a friend, who had one leg, prayed to Jesus and God with so much faith, that a leg grew on the woman in front of their very eyes.... now that will attract “Yeah! Righto then! Nutters!”. I find that utterly amazing that a crab can do it, but the most masterful species on the planet, with far far superior minds to crabs.... can’t? I know humans can, but, they’re so full of self doubt... not like crabs. Think about it (I use that story in my seminars).

b/ How do the crabs eat afterwards if they have no claws?

Or, do they just chop one off one crab, and another off another, pair them up, and have them knock around as quazi co joined crabs for a while? I’m writing to this morning again.

c/ If a soldier loses a leg in Iraq, he or she gets a prosthetic limb. So, what about polycarbonate prosthetic claws for these crabs? They could have those little pads they use for ECGs, and they could be attached to the crabs head, and the limbs could be mind operated; seeing that crabs are so *****y clever. You could even create Robocrabs, to protect the others from those fish that actually eat crabs.

Article submitted Thursday, April 02, 2009 & read 95 times.

Leave your comments through Ice Pop:

No comments yet.
We appreciate your comments!

1-0-1-0-6-ADSO

Most Recent