Make Your Relationship Normal Again - When the Niggles Set In and It Stops Being Fun

by Lucy OBrien
http://www.datingtorelationshipadvice.com

Relationships tend to start out pretty well. You feel you've hit it off with that wonderful someone and you can't wait to spend more time with him. Then somewhere along the line, the cracks begin to appear. The problems start to set in and the shine begins to wear off. When you notice that the niggles have set into your relationship and it somehow stopped being fun, what is really going on under the surface? And what can you do to put things right and make your relationship normal again?

When we first meet our man, we are usually both independent, self-sufficient people with lives of our own. However as time moves on, we give up some of this independence and we start to reveal our true personalities. We are unable to hide our flaws indefinitely and we begin to expect more from our partner in the way of support for the weaknesses and the imperfections that we don't feel able to fix in ourselves.

It can be tempting to lean on our partner when we don't feel strong. As we get to know him well, we learn how far he will support us in our weaknesses and how far we can push things before he starts to lose patience. We often tend to expect our man to act as our friend, our lover and our therapist and sometimes this is where the problems start.

At times we can get carried away with the negative situations in our lives, whether we perceive these to be caused by our man or whether they are the result of problems unrelated to the relationship. Now it no longer seems so perfect, we can be tempted to unburden ourselves on him or to blame him for what we see going wrong. We may let our frustration with everything overwhelm us and we can't help taking it out on him. Either way he bears the brunt of our negativity.

When this happens on a regular basis, we start to take this unburdening for granted. We become more dependent upon our partner to support us and the relationship becomes less fun. If we are focussing on the negatives, then it is highly unlikely that we are giving him positive feedback. We have stopped appreciating the good things about him and the relationship.

It is too much to expect our man to put up with this regularly and be happy about it. When the relationship stops being fun and starts to feel like work, it creates a strain on both partners and the negative part of the relationship spirals and increases. Frustration creates more frustration and the relationship becomes a breeding ground for anger, hurt and resentment.

Whilst a good relationship should allow each partner to lean a little on the other in times of need, please don't make your partner responsible for your happiness. If you find yourself constantly griping and grumbling in your relationship, then you can guarantee that it's not much fun for him either. Your relationship will start to deteriorate and, unless you take steps to resolve the situation, you will wonder why he becomes more distant and wants to spend less and less time with you.

So, if you notice that the going has got tough and the niggles have set in, take some remedial action. Don't let your relationship become a casualty of negativity. Lighten up and make sure that you inject some fun into your relationship. If you let it get too heavy the chances are that it will sink. Be sure to concentrate on the positives in your relationship and deal with the important negatives in a mature fashion. Then let the rest go. Appreciation of your partner is the key to a strong, loving relationship. Appreciation and fun will revive your relationship and make it normal again.

If you want a strong, loving relationship, then you need to understand what really makes a man feel good. There is a certain type of woman that a man is irresistibly attracted to. She knows how to captivate him and communicate with him to draw him close and get him to respond in the ways that she wants. You can learn to be the type of woman that men adore and never want to leave. For more information on how to keep a relationship going strong please feel free to visit my website.

Article submitted Friday, July 22, 2011 & read 334 times.

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