This Mother Almost Did the Unthinkable to Help Her Autistic Son
Mother’s tend to do whatever it takes to make sure their children are happy. But what happens when they have to do something a bit controversial? Kathy Lette is a best-selling Australian-British author who shocked many when she revealed the lengths she was willing to go to in order to help her lonely autistic son. The decision had some people doubting her role as a mother while others thought it was a great idea. Learn the whole story before you jump to an opinion on the matter.
1. A Bright Little Baby
When Julius Robertson was born, it was not obvious that he was on the Autistic spectrum. In fact, he was an early walker and talker. He was a completely normal, healthy baby, born to best-selling Australian-British Author Kathy Lette. It wasn’t until he was 14 months old, however, that it became obvious that something was wrong.
She described the realization by saying it was “as though his computer had crashed.” From the age of 14 months old, young Julius was not able to utter a word again until he was four and a half years old. Once he did, though, he never stopped talking. He surpassed many people’s expectations.
2. A True Savant
As Julius grew up, he was diagnosed with Autism. Still, he proved to be very intelligent and his mother was always impressed by the things he knew. For example, Lette said that Julius has a great photographic memory.
As a tennis fan, he was able to remember the score of every game in history. He also knew large amounts of information about a wide range of subjects, from sports to science to psychology. Lette describes her son truly as a “savant”. Despite all this, he had a hard time being sociable and outgoing. How did he fare in the cruel school years?
3. People bullied him
Despite his high level of intelligence and incredibly kind heart, people still thought he was weird simply because he was a bit different. Unfortunately, Julius was bullied and frequently referred to as a “retard.”
One day he asked “What does it mean when people call you a ’tard, Mum?” Lette didn’t have the heart to tell him. It was hard to send her son off to school knowing he was going to be bullied there. Still, he kept trying to make friends. Did he succeed?
4. Julius the Ladies’ Man?
Despite the taunting at school from other kids, Julius didn’t let the bullying keep him down. He always tried to fit in. That is why when puberty hit, like most boys, he too gained an interest in girls and was determined to get a girlfriend.
Yet, as Lette said, “the average teenage girl doesn’t think outside the ‘neurotypical’ box.” She said that girls tended to think her son is too abnormal to be with. Julius kept trying, though. At one point, he even walked around town holding a sign that said “Free Designer Shoes.” What were the fruits of his out-there seduction style?
5. Rejection After Rejection
It was so hard for Lette to see her son come home every day with a sad face because yet another girl had rejected his kind advances. He had such a good heart and wanted someone to love, like everyone else. Making it harder was seeing other people his age falling in love.
It seemed like boys his age could get girls easily but Julius had to try so hard to get a girl just to look at him. One time, a girl asked him to a party but it turned out to be a cruel joke. The constant rejection was getting to him and he was heading toward a very dark place.
6. “Will I ever have a girlfriend, mum?”
One night, Julius asked his mother if he would ever have a girlfriend. It broke her heart that her handsome son couldn’t get a girl to like him. Julius was a charming young man with a very kind heart and extremely intelligent mind.
Yet, girls at the school he went to ignored him and called him a “spaz.” Despite his myriad of good qualities, those who didn’t know him couldn’t see past his Autism. Although he tried to be happy person, it was tearing away at him inside. And his mother felt the pain as well. But what could she do?
7. Giving Up
Imagine being rejected every time you made advances toward someone and even made fun of during the process? This was Julius’s life day in and day out. By the time he was 20, he was starting to get especially frustrated.
He still hadn’t been given a chance to prove to a girl how wonderful he could be. The rejection and loneliness broke him down. He even asked his mom, “Maybe women will forever find me freakish and geekish?” It was hard to stay positive. Would he ever find love?
8. A Growing Depression
The stores of confidence that he once had in his teens were starting to get smaller and smaller with each passing day and each new rejection. A girl even called him a loser just because Julius asked her out. It was so hard for Lette to see how miserable her son was.
From all of these experiences, Lette said that her son would fall into loneliness and depression. He was no longer the happy person everyone once knew and loved. The one thing he wanted more than anything else was a person to at least go on a date with him. What was so wrong with this young man?
9. Julius’s Lowest Point
Although he didn’t have to deal with bullying anymore, the fact that he could not even get a date with a girl still affected his mood on a daily basis. His depression was worrying his mother more and more and he was making extremely worrying statements.
For example, one time at dinner, he looked up with sad eyes and asked, “If you’d known I’d be autistic, would you have aborted me? I’m sorry I’m such a disappointment as a son.” It was like a knife to her heart. Something had to be done to resolve this situation and she would try anything.
10. Looking For Love Online
Just like many people nowadays, Lette encouraged her son to sign up for a dating website in the hope that people there would be kinder. Yet, even online, the young man unfortunately had no such luck. His efforts were endearing but not very successful.
Julius wrote his own profile and it read “Come and join me in my magic world where relationships are at their very zany best.” That line tended to push women away and he only got one response from an 88-year-old grandmother.
11. Autistic Dating?
Julius wasn’t alone in his struggle to find a partner. In fact, it is a common problem that Autistic people face. Many also allow their parents to help them in the pursuit of romance, so Kathy turned to other families with Autistic children for answers.
Speaking with other families, she learned that many of those with autism shared the same rejection and heartbreak. Yet, nobody had an answer. How could this be? However, she did get a seemingly crazy suggestion. It sounded absurd but maybe it would succeed in cheering up Julius?
12. A Red Light Goes On
Lette started connecting with people through the National Autistic Society, particularly mothers, and she received bizarre advice from two of them: take her son to a brothel. It was shocking at first, but definitely made her think.Would she really be able to do that for her son?
The mothers said that at a brothel, Julius would be able to be set up with a prostitute who wouldn’t care if he has autism or not. It seemed weird to Lette to let someone to have sex with her son but she considered how it would help his self-esteem. Now, she had to find the right hooker.
13. A Possible Confidence Boost
In an article that Lette wrote for the Daily Mail about her son’s situation, she explained why she even considered the possibility of hiring a hooker for her son. “Even the temporary solace of sex might do something for his flagging confidence,” she wrote. It didn’t matter if it was something highly frowned upon by society.
She admitted, of course, how odd it sounded that she would consider hiring a prostitute to take her son’s virginity. But she also mentioned that being a mother of an autistic kid gave her a different view of the world. So Lette put aside her qualms and started asking male friends how to find a prostitute.
14. To Find a Prostitute
Now that Lette was open to the idea, the task of finding a prostitute proved more difficult than expected. She tried asking men she knew, though the question made most of them incredibly uncomfortable. Her male friends weren’t really forthcoming about the issue.
Eventually, one of the friends thought it was a great idea for Julius but his wife didn’t want him to get involved. Next she asked a female friend, who was originally from France, but she responded by angrily telling Lette, “How can you, a feminist, condone prostitution?” The plan almost seemed hopeless.
15. To the Prostitutes of London
Since no one would help her find a prostitute for her son and it became too touchy of a subject to even mention, Lette was at a dead end. With no other options, she realized that she’d have to find a prostitute herself, as strange as the idea might seem.
While driving near a red-light district in London one night, she decided to venture through and drove around until she saw a prostitute. Sure enough, the woman approached her car. The whole situation made Lette nervous. Could she actually go through with this?
16. The Consequences
Lette was sitting in her car on a sketchy street being approached by a prostitute offering her sex. It all proved to be too bizarre for her and began to make her think of the consequences both for herself and her son.
Since prostitution is illegal in the UK, she could get into a lot of trouble if she paid for one. She started to even think about how she wouldn’t be able to survive in jail were she to be caught. She drove away as quickly as she could. But now, what would she do for her poor son?
17. Julius’s Surprise
Lette was completely at a loss for what to do to help her son’s situation. However, it turned out to be good that she didn’t hire a prostitute because soon, there would be good news for Julius and, in a way, his family as well.
Right before he turned 21, Julius finally met someone who loved him and they soon began dating. Lette was so happy that her son finally met a girl who made him happy. But after this experience, others also decided to hire a prostitute for an Austistic son and it didn’t go as planned.
18. A Father Arrested
Lette was glad she didn’t hire a prostitute in the end. Soon after she abandoned the idea, news broke that a father was arrested for trying to get a prostitute for his autistic teenage son. Lette realized this could have been her.
Although he was let off with a suspended sentence, a scary thought went through her head. If that father would have gone to jail, his son would have been all alone. This easily could have been her reality. Fortunately it was not and the whole experience even lead to something amazing.
19. A New Book
Lette followed the court case of the father who was arrested closely and it actually inspired her next book. The book was called “Best Laid Plans”, about a mother who wants to find a prostitute for her son. But things go wrong. Sound familiar?
It is based not only on her experience but also on the experiences of other parents with autistic children.The tagline of the book is “When it comes to sex, even the best laid plans come unstuck – in the stickiest way possible.” The book was incredibly well received and ended up being influential in more ways than one.
20. The Book Comes to Life
People loved the hilarious book so much, especially how it openly showcased the real struggles that autistic people go through. Because of the book’s many fans and unique concept, it was picked up to become an eight-episode TV mini-series and its production is currently in the works.
It will definitely be a fascinating show, just like the book, because it portrays autistic people in a new light. Lette said she hopes the miniseries will “help to take the stigma out of Autism” or, at least, tell girls to not judge Autistic people so harshly.
21. Special Needs on the Small Screen
Most of the time, Autistic people in movies are either used for inspirational purposes or they are pitied. When has there been a TV show or movie that showed a special-needs person as being a normal human being that wants romance?
Lette said that in entertainment, people with special needs are “excluded from the intimacy.” She said that society shouldn’t force people to act according to what others perceive to be normal. Rather, she advocates for people with special needs to be who they want to be. Julius definitely made good on that with what happened next.
22. Julius the Actor
With a mother who always encouraged him to do whatever made him happy, Julius eventually took a shine to acting and apparently has quite a knack for it. Currently, he has a semi-regular role on the British medical drama “Holby City”.
On the show, Julius plays an autistic man and the producer, directors, and, other actors on the show adore him. He even has a fan following and Lette says her son regularly gets stopped for autographs. So has fame given his love life a boost too?
23. Love Comes Around
In the article that Lette penned in July, she mentioned that after four “intriguing romances,” Julius, now 25, was single again but happier than ever before. In early August, she announced that he had begun to date again, this time a 48-year-old woman. The age difference didn’t seem to matter because they were in love.
It must be noted that before Lette writes about any of her son’s details, she makes sure to have his permission. Why has he he agreed to have such intimate topics go public? Because he is a big advocate for bringing awareness to autism. He approves of anything that can possibly bring attention to the medical condition and portray people with Autism in a good light.
24. Critics are Everywhere
Not everyone has reacted positively to Lette’s efforts to help her son. Ever since she went public about how she even considered hiring a prostitute for Julius, she has received a lot of backlash.
She asked a poignant question to all the naysayers out there who criticize what she did for her son. “Why should [people with Autism] be denied the inalienable right to pursue love, happiness and human sexual contact?” she wrote.
25. “We all have special needs”
Parents struggle when their kids start dating and the situation is especially confusing for parents of people with special needs. Still, Lette made an interesting point recently: “Is anyone really ‘normal’ when it comes to sex? We all have special needs.” Lette’s main priority is to make sure her son is as happy as possible, even if that means doing something unconventional.
She wrote that “other mothers are over the moon when their sons get into Harvard or climb Mount Everest. But I have never been happier than the day my son got his first girlfriend.” Hopefully Julius will continue to find the love he wants and live his best life possible.
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Source: Daily Mail
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