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Real Struggles Of Using a Public Bathroom


I think the most annoying thing about human beings is the fact that we have a bladder that will force us to pee every couple of hours. Not only that, but we can’t just pee anywhere–it has to be in a freaking bathroom stall with a functioning toilet. What’s worse is being in a location where your only choice to relieve yourself in is smelly, over-used public bathrooms. Sure, we could just wait until we go home but sometimes it is our only choice for hours and there is only so long we can hold it in for. If it comes down to this, I just hold my breath and pee as quickly as I possibly can.

I think the most annoying thing about human beings is the fact that we have a bladder that will force us to pee every couple of hours. Not only that, but we can’t just pee anywhere–it has to be in a freaking bathroom stall with a functioning toilet. What’s worse is being in a location where your only choice to relieve yourself in is smelly, over-used public bathrooms. Sure, we could just wait until we go home but sometimes it is our only choice for hours and there is only so long we can hold it in for. If it comes down to this, I just hold my breath and pee as quickly as I possibly can.

If you’re a germophobe, being in a bathroom used by so many people every hour must make your skin crawl, but sometimes you have to be brave and make the best of it because public bathrooms are the worst no matter what you do.


John Greim/LightRocket

John Greim/LightRocket

First things first, you actually have to brace yourself to enter one. You may have peed in countless public bathrooms but it is always horrible every single time. You take your last deep breath and enter the gross restroom with a slight hope that it isn’t as bad as the last one.

Now it is like, pick your poison. Apparently, the stall closest to the exit is usually the least used but I feel like if everyone knows that, it defeats the purpose. Basically, you just have to find the least gross toilet to pee in. It’s a bonus if there isn’t anything left in the toilet bowl!


Warner Bros

The fact that there is a 50/50 chance of the toilet paper roll being empty is highly annoying. Before you even unbutton your pants, always check to see if there is toilet paper. If there isn’t and you don’t happen to have a pack of tissues on you, you are going to have to awkwardly steal some toilet paper from one of the icky stalls to use.

It is times like these that I wish I was a man because they can pee standing up without touching anything. Squatting is a skill women have learned at a young age because hell no is your ass going to touch a seat so many have touched. Plus, you never know what invisible things are lurking on that seat.


MGM

After you have done your business, it is time to push the handle with your foot or elbow if your balance isn’t good. Actually, I do the whole foot thing to flush all toilets unless I actually have to use my hand because it gives me enough time to get as far away from the spraying toilet as I can. Screw automatic toilets, though.

The worst part is over except now you have to wash your hands in a sink that so many people have used to clean their icky hands with. If you’re lucky, the sink will be automatic and you won’t actually have to touch anything besides the soap dispenser. If not, you are going to have to use an article of clothing or paper towel to turn the sink on.


NBC

Now you have to deal with the annoying hand dryers that literally only warm your still wet hands. Like seriously, who the hell invented these useless things? I get the whole, saving the trees thing, but paper towels are a necessity in bathrooms, especially public ones.

Bladder empty, hands clean, you can finally leave this public hell-room. When you step out of the bathroom, you have never felt so happy to breathe again. You have survived and now you can go rub hand sanitizer all over yourself until your skin stops crawling. Until next time public bathroom!

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