If You Never Call Your Pets By Their Names, You’re Not Alone
Recently, Twitter exposed a secret that every pet owner has probably been guilty of at least once: calling a pet by anything but his name. Twitter users had a ball listing the nicknames they used for their pet. The funniest part was how far the monikers veer away from the animal’s actual name.
From Cooper To Sweetboy
my dog’s name is cooper.
i call him–
i use sweetboy the most.
i call this mfer “cooper” exactly 7% of the time.
— fooler initiative (@metroadlib) January 23, 2019
Tweeter @metroadlib started off the Twitter-storm by revealing all the names for Cooper the dog. Some of the nicknames made sense, such as Coopypoopy. Others were a bit intriguing. What prompted Stinkboy? Poor stinky Cooper! @metroadlib drove home another inherent truth, too. Other Twitter users enthusiastically agreed that they only refer to their pets by their given names about 7 percent of the time.
Finnamon Bun The Cat
My cat’s name is Finn.
I call him
My baby boy!!
and STOPEATINGTHEDONUTS!!! https://t.co/2REn9jZdIi
— Yolanda Machado (@SassyMamainLA) January 23, 2019
Yolanda, aka @SassyMamainLA, told Twitter that she has a cat called Finn, then shared his most common nicknames. Twitter immediately wanted to own Finn, too. The urge was understandable because who doesn’t want a cat that answers to Finnamon Bun? That nickname possibly won the game all by itself. Can you think of any name cuter than Finnamon Bun?
How Cesare Became Chestercorn Wallace
My dog’s name is Cesare.
I call him:
Chesterson Mayfield III
— SalamanderHamilton (@BalthazarBlakee) January 23, 2019
User @BalthazarBlakee didn’t actually explain the progression from Cesare to Chestercorn. Fortunately, the list of nicknames for Cesare was so charming and grand that it doesn’t matter. Cesare responded to such nicknames as Chezerito Burrito and Boosifer, but Chesterson Mayfield III is clearly the classiest nom de plume ever created.
Francis The Guinea Pig
my guinea pig’s name is Francis
I can him:
toothless wonder (one of his teeth fell out after he had an unfortunate fall)
lil shit https://t.co/s4KvKgyriL
— birthday katie 🌹 (@myfairKT) January 23, 2019
The social media platform proved that dogs and cats weren’t the only pets with dozens of nicknames. User @myfairKT had a guinea pig named Francis with lofty aspirations. She referred to him as Francois, too, for a bit of French flair, as well as FranFran and Toothless Wonder, due to an unfortunate accident that resulted in the loss of one of his little tiny teeth.
When Jigsaw Met Hannibal
I have a bunny named Jigsaw. I call her:
– My Girl
– My Baby Girl
– Hey Girl
I also have a bunny named Hannibal. I call him:
– My Little Cannibal
– Cannibal Bunny
– Little One
– Itty Bitty One
– Tiny Baby https://t.co/tmV3dKjmSN
— Jenny Nulf 👻 (@jennyleighx33) January 23, 2019
Bunnies appeared more than once on the list, but Tweeter @jennyleighx33 won the award for the pet owner whose pets had the most unique names originally. Bunny Jigsaw, named after the Saw franchise, had several gentle nicknames, such as Jiggy and Cutie. Jigsaw’s pal Hannibal was named after Hannibal Lecter. Naturally, he was also known as My Little Cannibal and Cannibal Bunny. Hopefully no one’s ever offered him any fava beans.
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